What is the Toughest Punishment i Have to Deal With?

This is such a great question. Honestly, every punishment offers a great deal of difficulty because i know it means i have disappointed Master.  Because Master incorporates many different kinds of punishments, i find many of them difficult in different ways.

Emotionally, i would have to say that being denied the privilege of serving Master is most difficult. To know that i have disappointed Him so much that He feels it best to not have me serve Him is absolutely awful.  It makes feel sad, ashamed, and lost.

On a humiliation level, having write about my transgressions is absolutely the worst.  In the past Master has had me write about what i did wrong, why it was wrong, what i should have done, and why i won’t do it again. These writing assignments are awful. The entire time i am writing it, i know the answers and i know that i knew better from the beginning. These are humiliating for me because it is embarrassing to know that i made a mistake that was totally unnecessary.

Physical pain is also very tough.  Master has used a variety of implements for my spankings. This far Master has used His hand, a hairbrush, His belt, a metal spatula and the wooden handle of a bath brush. i will be and say that i have not felt the full force of all these implements. Master took a while to get used to the idea of inflicting physical pain on me (a result of 30 years of being told to never hit a girl.) Lately, Master has really come to understand the importance of the pain within O/our dynamic.  Master chooses the belt most often as it is handy.  my least favorite is the metal spatula as it is very large and covers a great deal of skin. The spatula offers a swift sting over a large area and offers no flexibility to soften the blow.

Every single punishment is difficult. If it were easy it wouldn’t be very effective.  Each and every punishment leaves me feeling ashamed but loved. (For more on my feelings during punishment please read this blog post.) Master is always looking for more punishment ideas to add to his arsenal, so please feel free to share you favorite punishments, or least favorite as the case may be, in the comments section below.

(thanks STAR for the great question. i enjoyed really thinking about the different punishments and putting my thoughts on paper.)

What Are my Rules, and Why Are They Important

It is important for Master and i to have clear, discussed, written rules. By having my rules already discussed and written out, i know in advance what is expected of me, and also that at this point they are nonnegotiable.  When W/we first sat down to discuss rules, W/we had both searched the Internet and brought a few rules W/we each found and began composing the list.  Over time, as O/our relationship has grown and developed, so have the rules.  At one time the rules were very specific and there were many.  Over the many revisions, rules have been added, changed and completely taken out of the list. 

All of the rules are based in a simple all inclusive rule. The basic rules are:

• MASTER is in control of all situations. 
• MASTER will be addressed with appropriate title (“My Love” in public, and “Sir or Master” in private) 
•  SLAVE will always thank MASTER. 
• SLAVE will always attend to MASTER’s needs before her own.  
• Chores are to be completed in a timely manner.  
• SLAVE must always follow protocol for discussions/disagreements.  
•  SLAVE will never interrupt MASTER when he is speaking, or publicly disagree with his decisions/statements.  
• MASTER will always be greeted with a smile and a kiss.  

So all in all, the rules come down to one thing: Always show respect for Master, in every situation, every time.  

Master has also made a list of rules for when W/we are alone as well those for specifically public situations. 

In public:

• SLAVE will always walk and stand/sit to MASTER’s right side.  
• SLAVE will always address MASTER using the pet name “My Love.” 
•  SLAVE will wait until after MASTER takes first bite of his food/drink before indulging in eating or drinking. 
• SLAVE will always act appropriately as her actions reflect upon him. 

In private: 

•  SLAVE will wait for direction from MASTER, SLAVE will stand near closest wall, hands to her side and looking downward.  
•  SLAVE will not speak unless spoken to, or instructed to unless in “free time”. 
• SLAVE will ask for permission before entering or exiting the room/bed/etc for any reason. If denied, SLAVE will obey.  

These additional rules were put into place to help me remember my place is beneath Master’s.  This list of rules gives me a certain security within O/our relationship and better allows me to be what Master wants without specific direction.  This is especially helpful in O/our vanilla public lives.  

While these rules have been very helpful in reinforcing my role, Maintenance Spankings can also be quite helpful for reinforcing my submission to Master.  

What are Some of my Biggest Challenges Within the Dynamic?

?Every relationship has challenges.  For me, that hardest parts of being Master’s slave are regulating my emotions and keeping up with my chores.  Admittedly, as a person i can be overly emotional and can be a bit lazy. 

As Master’s slave, i am required to maintain a respectful attitude and honor Master, even when i am upset.  This is definitely easier said than done.  i often find myself unable to do this.  Coming from O/our relationship being with me pretty much the final say, i often get upset when things don’t go the way i think they should.  i tend to express this by either being snappy with Master, pouting, or trying to get out of doing things asked of me.  Realistically, i know that this is not the way i should behave, but sometimes it just happens. 

The other real issue i experience is getting motivated to do my daily chores.  After a few days of doing really well, my chores seem so tedious. i like when my home and life is clean and organized, and it is important for Master as well.  Master has taken the pressure of these tasks off of my shoulders by holding me accountable. 

While these are the things i have the most difficulty with, they are part of the dynamic because Master knows these are things i would like to improve.  In an attempt to help me improve, Mastet us taken the responsibility from me and has given Himself as my accountability system.  When i behave in a way that is counter productive to who i want o be, Master takes on the difficult task of correcting me. To read more about my punishments for these and other infractions, please read this blog post.