When i have not completed my duties to Master, or i have been disrespectful to Master, it is necessary for Master to discipline me. Usually, this includes a punishment of some kind.(For more on why punishment is necessary in O/our relationship, please read this blog post.) i understand that this is an important part of O/our relationship. The short answer to how this makes me feel is ashamed and loved.
The primary feeing during and after discipline and correction is shame. i am ashamed that i have disappointed Master. Master does so much can for me, and when i do not live up to the standards he has set it greatly disturbs me. i know my rules, and what is expected of me. Master doesn’t ask more of me than i am able to do, so there is really no excuse for my needing to be corrected. i also feel shame that my actions caused Master to go against His want to not punish me.
Discipline and correction also make me feel loved. Master does not enjoy having to correct and punish me. However, Master does so out of love for me. Master knows that in order for me to be fufilled in this relationship, my service should eventually become flawless (well, close to flawless- no one is perfect after all). When Master goes against the in grained theory that He should never treat me badly by society’s standard, it is an internal struggle. With each smack or minute of punishment i know that Master is fighting Himself. Why does He do it then? Because Master’s love for me is so strong. i know this and feel it fully with each act of discipline- and i thank Him for it.